A Stroll down the Memory lane..,

 1. Practical Teaching  A husband fought with wife , blaming her for affair with someone. Wife wanted to teach a lesson practically without any scenes. Her friend texted, I like you, and this creates havoc ending in separation after 8 long years silent battling. Who is culprit? 2. Behaviour  A mother cooks food for her 4 daughters and serves them , another girl who is with her grandparents in the same house , caring for the 4 daughters also waits for her lunch plate but the mother who is a teacher , throws chapati without any kindness in her plate and shouts ," now eat fast and don't loitre lazily. So many clothes to be washed , hurry up.  The girl with teary eyes looks at the 4 daughters plates with painful heart wishing she could be one amongst the 4 girls.  3. Kids Learn Fast One day my grandson all of a sudden said ,"don't fool me " immediately my daughter asked , "where did you hear this way to speak " instantly he replied, "I heard appa sayi...

I am blessed to be grown amongst laughter and fun with cousins, discipline and teachings from elders, guidance and support from elder uncles while enjoying each and every moment spent in summer holidays with our grandparents and it was the happiest time of our lives as otherwise we would spread our wings to different places and await eagerly for the summer holidays! We would listen to the stories behind every Fasting done by our Nanima. She was dusky and beautiful with a grace on her face full of spirituality when she would perform everyday Pooja rituals and give us Prasad. It was a pleasure to relish the Prasad given by her.. We cousins would play and if some disputes turned into arguments the smart one would run to Nanaji lap when he would be performing Pooja none can dare go near him and the one who could get on his lap in trouble would be saved! We know one day our grandparents would leave us but when they departed as destined our hearts refused to accept the reality shared in so m...

What is the definition of a relationship? Any type of involvement in two persons can be called as relationship. Since ages we have been fond of love stories. In almost every state one love story is famous and many hit films have been made. Watching these films shows our liking for love stories. We have become modern in every sense like dressing, food habits, living style and even rearing kids to a great extent but when it comes to marriage still we beat the age old drums adamantly. We genuinely appreciate someone next door for their broad attitude and inter-caste marriage, but when our children tell us or we somehow come to know their any such relationship, the immediate reaction is violent and rash without a second thought. We tend to treat our grown up children as toddlers in this matter. Why we are so hypocrites? Fond of  pretending in real life whereas others we preach without any hesitation. Actually our age old culture has spread its roots so very deep that it is impossi...

बचपन में मुझे याद है मैं बेहद डरपोंक और दब्बू थी क्यों पता नहीं लेकिन दूसरों की गलतियों पर मैं ही डांट खाती थी।  हिम्मती नहीं थी या दूसरों को बचाने के चक्कर में फंस जाती थी, याद नहीं । एक दिन जब मैं इसी तरह पकड़ी गयी तब हमारे जीवविज्ञान के शिक्षक ने बिना मेरी सुने सजा दी और चले गए। जब मैंने कहा कि मैंने गलती नहीं की तब उन्होंने पूछा ,"क्या मेरी आंखें देखती नहीं मैंने तुम्हे देखा और तुम नकार रही हो हद होती है " शाम को जब वो बाजू वाली कक्षा में आये तब मुझसे कहा , क्षमा मांगने में इतना क्यों हिचकती हो। तब भी मैंने दोहराया कि वाकई गलती मेरी नहीं थी।  उन्होंने गुस्से में कक्षा में आकर पूछा कि गलती किसने की और जब पता चला कि उन्होंने जब दस्ती मुझे सजा  तो उनसे कुछ कहा नहीं गया क्योंकि गलती उन्होंने की थी शर्मिन्दा भी वो ही थे। जहां बोलना चाहिए यदि वहां भी ओठों पर चुप्पी रहे तो कसूरवार कौन कहा जाएगा ? बचपन में जब मैं छोटी थी लगभग 40 सालों के पहले ज्यादातर बच्चों की बातों को महत्त्व नहीं दिया जाता था , परिवार भी बड़े थे और पारिवारिक स्थितियां भी सहज नहीं ह...

I wish I could be reborn again to enjoy my growing stage with my ever loving zinda dil mamaji who never for a moment left his zest. We were so much fond of him that it seemed like a competition to be around him, with silly reasons just because we loved him so deep. I remember preparing paan for him which mamaji used to relish lot, I just applied lots of choona and kaththaa without realising its result on my dear mamaji's tongue, he also took and chewed it. I was on 9th cloud with happiness and later when I came to know how much he suffered of my overflowing love I felt miserable but he didn't utter a word about it to me. I still remember the resonant singing of Jagjit Singh gazals which he loved much and anytime it would be in the air when he was at home. the memorable notes..yeh daulat bhi le lo...Wo kaagaz ki kashti wo baarish ka paani... Being with him was simply a joy. Be it watching him wash his milk white dresses with lemon and besan for stains or taking bath over our ...

   I often think about Parenting. Its an art to be mastered with great  care. Generally we can hear people say children are gifts of God, yes  quite true but in real sense how many of us realize the true value of  our very own children. After climbing the steps of various temples if  you bear a child that's not a great proof of your love. How you rear,  care, shape, cherish, support, nurture and of course understand means a lot. We cherish every moment of a growing child. After a certain  period we have another child, automatically our attention gets divided  and from here starts another story. Many know to tackle intellectually  whereas many simply don't. Our rearing of children should not be based  on money, it should have more amount of love. I have seen people cursing their children so badly that the relationship has nothing  except bitterness. Many children feel lonely in teen  Nurturing  age, when they nee...

Friendship means a silent rapport between two people who may not essentially have same interests but great liking for each other. Till children are in teens they aren't much bothered about friendship. Even parents don't feel worried but in teen age suddenly all turn their attention towards the growing children making them feel little awkward. Frankly speaking they are in confusion and stress regarding personal appearance, sudden growth which they find uneasy, lots of unanswered questions and above all this parental interference in everything they do. They hang between childhood and growing age. None gives them importance only pouches of advice. The only thing they like is friends. They find comfort in friends' company but freedom is often restricted on the grounds of falling in bad company. Now the question comes to mind, how to determine good and bad friends? I wont agree that average studying students can't be good friends and only toppers are eligible for frie...

Parents nowadays are so very friendly to the children that I feel like I should be reborn to enjoy the entire experience of growing up afresh. I think mainly our changed family patterns owe much to be praised. The young ones feel comfortable in everything they do whereas nearly 10 yrs ago they need to ask so many people for consent before taking any decision that the spirit would almost dampen of doing something different on their own. Actually we must encourage children to take decisions so that self confidence grows and they become strong individuals. If we take all the major decisions for them how at all they would become confident? I have seen a few parents helping their son or daughters cross the main road while going to school and colleges. Teach them proper ways to cross roads instead. A 9th standard girl can't go to school on her own as she lacks the confidence without her mother to help her. Guide, counsel, advise but do not dominate their minds to the extent of making ...

I have always been fond of pets..how the love started can't tell accurately but I remember one fine morning vividly, when I was just 9 yrs, enjoying the morning cool breeze when suddenly my attention diverted towards a feeble sound and the very next moment a squirrel fell down on our terrace floor. It actually slipped from a crow somehow maybe for me. Though its neck was injured still alive. My joys knew no bounds and in excitement I just came running around without knowing what to do to save that poor squirrel. After some time my excitement reduced and I took it inside to little hot place so as to save from cold and applied turmeric and coconut oil paste gently over the injury. It slept or was unconscious I could not guess. I remember every morning taking it to a sugarcane juice seller and giving drops of juice with a cotton swab. It relished and gradually started taking liquids especially fruit juice and looked well nourished in a few weeks time. We would let it out for some ...

आज लगभग 18  सालों के बाद भी याद आने से आंखें  नम हो जातीं हैं , दुनिया में इंसानियत लगभग ख़त्म हो चुकी है।  मेरे छोटे बेटे के प्रसव के लिए जब घर से अस्पताल निकली तब मुझे ज़रा सी भी उम्मीद नहीं थी लेकिन मेरे कमजोर स्वास्थ्य के बावजूद मैंने 12 घंटों के बाद पूरी तरह स्वस्थ राकेश को जन्म दिया। तीन दिनों के बाद उसकी आंखें थोड़ी पीली दिखने से मैंने डॉक्टर से देखने का अनुरोध किया जिस पर उन्होंने ध्यान ही नहीं दिया लेकिन पांच दिनों के बाद बच्चे को बचा सकने का आश्वासन भी देने में असमर्थता जाहिर की। मेरा डरना स्वाभाविक था लेकिन हिम्मत जुटाकर  मैंने जूझने का फैसला किया और दिन रात जागकर बच्चे पर पूरी नज़र रखी ताकि सचमुच ही मैं मेरे बेटे को न खो बैठूं। थोड़ी सी असावधानी भी मेरे नवजात के लिए जानलेवा साबित हो सकती थी इसलिए रात और दिन बिना सोये रखवाली करना मेरा डर सा बन चुका था। सिवाय डर कुछ भी मन में था ही नहीं। हर नज़र यही पूछती थी कि कब तक ये लड़ाई चलेगी मौत से ? मैं लेकिन सिर्फ भगवान से जान की भीख  मांगती रही और मेरी आशा निराशा में नह...

Even today after almost 24 years I still recall the day with a heavy heart when I had to leave the new born baby wrapped in a blue soft towel in the lawns of the hanging garden in Mumbai, without being able to help despite my willingness. We had gone for a stroll when I saw a small baby and asked my husband to accept and adopt that child, on that my husband retorted, "what would you tell others especially my parents?" I had to drop the thought though with much indignation. He was absolutely right. I always wanted to foster many girls and train them in all the skills so that they never have to feel inferior or take a negative decision in desperation. In any country I don't think any mom would leave her baby like an orphan anywhere else but imagine under how much agony a woman has to take such a drastic decision and how much guilt she will carry lifelong for her mistake? Had seen a movie where the mother of a grown up I.A.S. son feels bad on an occasion for her son...

Woman though strong yet express her agonies, pains to someone whereas on the contrary man considered as stronger have the least thoughts about expressing or should say give vent to their feelings because of their rearing. I met a friend after a long span and was beyond limit surprised to note how lonely a man can feel and how hard try to conceal his feelings to keep himself locked in a cocoon! Self made cocoon to show his manliness or maintain the standards set by our own loved ones! The smile of a person apart from age and sex barriers can be as sweet as a child if the spirit is alive! What efforts do we apply once the children have grown to a certain extent but is a noteworthy thing! I have seen 28 years boys trying hard and then breaking like a small child, often wonder why we are so blind!! The experience made me think WHY do we follow this partiality towards our counterparts? It's deep down mingled in our bloodstream which must be changed. On the slightest pretexts nowadays ...

In most of the families old parents are treated as a burden. Children learn lots of positive qualities from elders without any efforts like adjustment, reverence, politeness, self control and above all patience and sharing which is a rare thing when both the parents are working and family is nuclear. Children tend to take negative decisions in a critical situation very easily these days whereas it was not commonly seen earlier. Slight restrictions also make children upset to the extent of suicide because they lack patience and control. A friend of mine shocked me one day when I was on my way to hospital with lunch for my mother- in-law who suffered a stroke at that time. It was scorching hot and I had to walk almost for half an hour. She met me on the road, asked me, "Why in such a hot climate you are taking so much trouble? Instead you can put them in home for aged people, they take really good care and you know even do the last rites after their death. We need only pay t...

Almost every candidate who comes to me expresses inability to talk fluently and asks instantly, in how many months they can become fluent? Actually efficiency in any language can be acquired by constant practice within a short span of time. In learning any language reading has a very vital role resulting in fast learning as well accuracy, even to express ourselves in many a ways. I recall being fussy in reading English books and always running behind my mother for translating the stories. My father who somehow always seemed very rigid, frowned and ordered to read at least thrice for better  understanding. Though not at all willing I had to go through but lo and behold! I could enjoy reading the story step by step unfolding before my eyes an unseen wonderful world and the experience was simply spellbinding!! From that day I found myself surprisingly very very willing to visit the library and also I turned out to be an avid reader. My father also insisted on not referring often...

Affairs show a strong liking of two people. Age, family background, marital status even beauty can't be a hurdle. Generally we tend to suppress desires, especially females though many factors have a role in it yet when any emotion is suppressed it has an intense force the next time. Knowingly when sexual feelings are suppressed it is in search of a vent. We give importance to income, living standard, education, property accumulation as assets but the force to live comes from inter-personal relationship which is completely ignored and given least importance. Everyone needs acceptance and a strong desire to live.Without it a person loses interest in life. When a marriage is fixed mostly horoscopes are matched to see how suitable the pair would be for married life but so many arranged marriages fail and without any such love marriages are seen to be successful. The main thing is understanding and fulfillment. Our culture doesn't allow a woman to express her desires at all, so f...

Education and job of girls is getting priority nowadays thus late marriage has become common, as a result delayed conceptions and related problems have turned attention towards test tube babies. The couples find it really tough to cope up with the expenses for getting a baby. Still people hesitate at the thought to adopt a baby, rather than waiting endlessly in agony it's much better option. Age, mental stress, quality time spent together and physical health count a lot. Frequent consumption of fast food, cool drinks, unhealthy food habits and lack of adequate rest have very important role in conception. Planning for many things like own home, better job, secured income etc take most of the quality time. Baby is not given adequate and timely importance and then remains frustration, disappointments, pain and worries. This topic is so much painful that can not be expressed in words, till you do not have a baby. Though it is completely personal thing still people are so fond of kno...

So easily people comment on prostitution as if by birth they are in this profession. If our eyes can cross their smiling face we can see the pain behind. I have seen very closely the pain they keep buried inside. We see white as a pure colour but behind it are hidden red, green and blue like violent colours in a certain combination. After marriage once I had gone to sea-shore and while enjoying the cool breeze felt lost, suddenly a pretty girl attracted my attention. She was inviting my husband in alluring style to spend time with her, I could not resist myself and observed her minutely. Wearing a loose attire she seemed to evoke desires in even a female than no need to tell about males. My husband simply turned down her mood in a rough manner and she left the spot without the slightest trace of any emotion on her bright face. I asked my husband why he treated her so harshly and he replied that he hated them very much. It's such an easy thing to say but are they culprit? A mal...

What do we mean by family, A married couple and their children is a family. Usually in a middle class family it is correct. As far I have observed in most of the families husband is the bread winner and wife is expected to manage home. We rear female child in such a way that she manages the duties of a mother well. Automatically a girl is trained to copy her mother. Mostly ladies have to sacrifice their identity to get a smooth atmosphere at home. Its expected and also done in automatic manner. After marriage girls adapt themselves according to the members of the new family to get acceptance easily. Here only the seed is sown though unknowingly. Till they have their family the thought of individuality never comes to their mind. They are content in family completely. As the children cross a certain age and get ready to set their lives which is also quite natural thing, the mothers feel insecure and little lonely due to the slack in their tight schedule, to fulfill the needs of the ch...