Individuality of Woman
What do we mean by family, A married couple and their children is a family. Usually in a middle class family it is correct. As far I have observed in most of the families husband is the bread winner and wife is expected to manage home. We rear female child in such a way that she manages the duties of a mother well. Automatically a girl is trained to copy her mother. Mostly ladies have to sacrifice their identity to get a smooth atmosphere at home. Its expected and also done in automatic manner. After marriage girls adapt themselves according to the members of the new family to get acceptance easily. Here only the seed is sown though unknowingly.
Till they have their family the thought of individuality never comes to their mind. They are content in family completely. As the children cross a certain age and get ready to set their lives which is also quite natural thing, the mothers feel insecure and little lonely due to the slack in their tight schedule, to fulfill the needs of the children round the clock, suddenly they feel lost and depressed. In this stage they need more emotional support and kind attitude but exactly opposite they get, harsh behavior and lack of understanding. Ladies have a sense of isolation and suffer psychologically mostly. Working ladies suffer even more as they have to do double duty.
If after marriage a girl tries to maintain her individuality against the set standards, she is not given acceptance and much against her desires she has to surrender to the fixed values of a family. Whereas if a girl tries her level best but finds it hard to get adjusted or accepted thus feeling uncomfortable completely decides to take divorce she is questioned by the entire society as if she has committed a crime and its her fate to adjust and sacrifice her happiness lifelong just for being married.
I have seen middle class as well upper class ladies who found their life not smooth and opted divorce as solution, in late age suffering from the same loneliness housewives experience. What's the difference in both type of ladies? There is a difference called 'Sympathy', people or society supports the sacrificing women and show little sympathy whereas the divorced ladies lack this 'sympathy'. The question pops in my mind what's the use of this sympathy in any way? It won't change the course of your life then why long for it?
We need rear our girl child to be independent and also imbibe strong values so that she learns to become a good and strong individual. If you rely on others for your needs, definitely you can never feel content. There is nothing wrong in being a strong individual. Society never supports revolutionary things in any age, they get strong opposition. If you have the zest and grit then need not expect support, automatically one day people would follow your steps but till then you have to stand on your own confidently.
Never look back and regret. Originality means sacrificing or making your 'self' immune to normal things. To keep you zestful learn to involve yourself in some activities which give satisfaction and happiness. These activities would keep you alive and of course contribute in avoiding late stage problems usually faced by ladies. Our mentality due to average rearing is the root cause of many things. I remember reading about Kiran Bedi, she was never treated as a normal girl by her parents and so she could achieve. Our attitudes need to change. woman has tremendous energy and patience to put painstaking efforts in anything she plans to do, why then put barriers around her. In every stage she has to undergo lot of restrictions and that limits her true growth.
Though Divorce is unwanted term in our society and we can never accept it in any circumstances yet if a lady finds it hard to survive despite adjustments I do not think it is wrong to go for a divorce at all. If maintaining a family means the end of a lady's individuality there is nothing wrong in taking divorce. We need change our age old customs and traditions to accept a woman as equal partner. Thanks to the new generation, girls get good education and their opinion is given importance, its a good change in society and we must appreciate it openly.
Every person has some basic rights and I think no one should be deprived of their rights in any way by anyone. First of all the woman need realize her own potential and identify herself and respect her own self then only she can gain respect. Till we run behind to make others happy no one would care about us, realize and prepare yourself, what you do reflects when you age so take care of your self in every manner to get the essence of your potentials, which no one should be allowed to underestimate.
Awareness is quite essential to bring a change in your status and the treatment you get and deserve from society. Sarojini naidu, Indira Gandhi, Vijaylakshmi Pandit, Muthulaxmi Reddy all were born in India and achieved ahead of their times because they realized their dreams and strived to fulfill it. Come take a step forward and see the changes you face in attitudes of people around you....
Till they have their family the thought of individuality never comes to their mind. They are content in family completely. As the children cross a certain age and get ready to set their lives which is also quite natural thing, the mothers feel insecure and little lonely due to the slack in their tight schedule, to fulfill the needs of the children round the clock, suddenly they feel lost and depressed. In this stage they need more emotional support and kind attitude but exactly opposite they get, harsh behavior and lack of understanding. Ladies have a sense of isolation and suffer psychologically mostly. Working ladies suffer even more as they have to do double duty.
If after marriage a girl tries to maintain her individuality against the set standards, she is not given acceptance and much against her desires she has to surrender to the fixed values of a family. Whereas if a girl tries her level best but finds it hard to get adjusted or accepted thus feeling uncomfortable completely decides to take divorce she is questioned by the entire society as if she has committed a crime and its her fate to adjust and sacrifice her happiness lifelong just for being married.
I have seen middle class as well upper class ladies who found their life not smooth and opted divorce as solution, in late age suffering from the same loneliness housewives experience. What's the difference in both type of ladies? There is a difference called 'Sympathy', people or society supports the sacrificing women and show little sympathy whereas the divorced ladies lack this 'sympathy'. The question pops in my mind what's the use of this sympathy in any way? It won't change the course of your life then why long for it?
We need rear our girl child to be independent and also imbibe strong values so that she learns to become a good and strong individual. If you rely on others for your needs, definitely you can never feel content. There is nothing wrong in being a strong individual. Society never supports revolutionary things in any age, they get strong opposition. If you have the zest and grit then need not expect support, automatically one day people would follow your steps but till then you have to stand on your own confidently.
Never look back and regret. Originality means sacrificing or making your 'self' immune to normal things. To keep you zestful learn to involve yourself in some activities which give satisfaction and happiness. These activities would keep you alive and of course contribute in avoiding late stage problems usually faced by ladies. Our mentality due to average rearing is the root cause of many things. I remember reading about Kiran Bedi, she was never treated as a normal girl by her parents and so she could achieve. Our attitudes need to change. woman has tremendous energy and patience to put painstaking efforts in anything she plans to do, why then put barriers around her. In every stage she has to undergo lot of restrictions and that limits her true growth.
Though Divorce is unwanted term in our society and we can never accept it in any circumstances yet if a lady finds it hard to survive despite adjustments I do not think it is wrong to go for a divorce at all. If maintaining a family means the end of a lady's individuality there is nothing wrong in taking divorce. We need change our age old customs and traditions to accept a woman as equal partner. Thanks to the new generation, girls get good education and their opinion is given importance, its a good change in society and we must appreciate it openly.
Every person has some basic rights and I think no one should be deprived of their rights in any way by anyone. First of all the woman need realize her own potential and identify herself and respect her own self then only she can gain respect. Till we run behind to make others happy no one would care about us, realize and prepare yourself, what you do reflects when you age so take care of your self in every manner to get the essence of your potentials, which no one should be allowed to underestimate.
Awareness is quite essential to bring a change in your status and the treatment you get and deserve from society. Sarojini naidu, Indira Gandhi, Vijaylakshmi Pandit, Muthulaxmi Reddy all were born in India and achieved ahead of their times because they realized their dreams and strived to fulfill it. Come take a step forward and see the changes you face in attitudes of people around you....
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