Attitudes Need Change

What is the definition of a relationship? Any type of involvement in two persons can be called as relationship. Since ages we have been fond of love stories. In almost every state one love story is famous and many hit films have been made. Watching these films shows our liking for love stories.

We have become modern in every sense like dressing, food habits, living style and even rearing kids to a great extent but when it comes to marriage still we beat the age old drums adamantly. We genuinely appreciate someone next door for their broad attitude and inter-caste marriage, but when our children tell us or we somehow come to know their any such relationship, the immediate reaction is violent and rash without a second thought. We tend to treat our grown up children as toddlers in this matter.

Why we are so hypocrites? Fond of  pretending in real life whereas others we preach without any hesitation. Actually our age old culture has spread its roots so very deep that it is impossible to change our attitude. Is it that difficult in reality? Certainly not. When we can accept a new comer in our family as a daughter-in-law why can't we accept a person be a son-in-law or daughter-in-law whom our wards choose?

We must opt a healthy attitude if at all we feel the desire to be with family. Mostly we see people stay under a roof but have miles gap between them. Why then this false scenario of a family staying together in harmony?? To a particular stage children depend on parents for everything including emotional needs and support. As they grow their likes differ and they get new people in their circle, its quite natural they get attracted towards someone and have a soft corner for them. So what? I don't think it is a mistake. Its a natural instinct to love. Why this tantrum then from all the parents not to ever marry of their own choice?

We should have the heart to see our children happy but needless to say they genuinely need our guidance and of course loving support. Everyone has some basic rights and being a parent we should never impose ourselves on them. By imposing actually we may feel pride temporarily but in the long run the fragrance of relationship loses its freshness and eventually none is happy. Many a times the couples who are separated by parents just due to the fear of society, lose happiness and sometimes even life to leave the parents regret.

A few parents have the heart to accept their children selection but a few reluctantly accept as they do not wish to lose their son but torment the girl of his choice. It is not a good thing. We indirectly hurt our children and by behaving adamantly gradually lose their genuine affection for us. For name sake We are together. Hypocrisy is never good in harmonious family life. Little generous attitude would not only keep family intact also would bring respect, then its senseless to blame the new girl for your already cracked relationships.

A few friends have opted love-marriage and though initially their parents too thought in the same prejudiced manner, changed attitude and shared lively relationship surprisingly. I learnt lot from my own marriage, to judge people duplicate attitudes,  not very transparent behavior, the way problems induced in innocent minds, how things are twisted and given new attire and sense. Simply ridiculous and painful, in the end who gains? None just a game to kill the time but at what cost?

As far my observation goes I have seen love marriages are stronger due to the deep liking they share, mutual understanding is more and also genuine efforts to make their family a happy family whereas in arranged marriages shamelessly many blame their parents for selecting a misfit as spouse, also they take the personal problems to others for justification which seems really not decent. Society but supports arranged marriages and is always against the love marriages which is purely injustice and unfair.

Little mutual understanding would bring much happiness and also a broad thinking in society. We can certainly reduce the constant growing greed of dowry to some extent. Our next generation would be more efficient in every manner. In remote villages too we get good welcome for hybrid seeds, animals also when of cross breed get good response, then why this mentality for our own race?

I hope now the present generation would be more supportive and not follow the age old beaten track in marriage matters, it is the main pulse to change the entire attitude. If at all we are truly intellect, without any prejudiced attitude must support love marriages and in return gain much happiness as not a single son would leave parents happily, after struggling when unable to change their attitude a son in despair leaves parents. Ego, fear of society and of course lack of broad thinking only make us cripple and ultimately lose our children permanently.

Little understanding attitude is always better. Hats off to the Supportive Parents and their children who could convince them for their choice.

With a hope to see a changed society....